Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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