You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
