Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
