She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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