Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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