I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
