so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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