Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
