I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
