this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize