Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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