mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
