that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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