Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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