I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
