i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
