Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
