is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
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