So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
