Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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