i think i have two assholes
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
