we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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