I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
