She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Semen is not good for contacts.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize