It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
