So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
