Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
