your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize