So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
