Buhtt sex?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
