Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
