Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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