How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
dude. I can hear the air.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
