Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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