I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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