Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
