I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
