Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
