You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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