I think my vagina is haunted
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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