i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
