Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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