what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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