A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
