Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
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