Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Randomize
