the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
