Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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