Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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