am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
