He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
